My 3 year old son sleeps in my bed.  In between my husband and me.   I dream about passing out in a Mexican border town & having a kidney cut out of me because he kicks me in the back all night.  He still sleeps with us because we are too lazy to get him in his own room.   Fits + sleepless nights= path of least resistance.

Obviously, the lady who got her nipple pierced with a 3 year old is suffering from the same ailments.

I’m too busy to care about the whole breastfeeding debate that will arise, just as it does every 2-3 years,  out of this Time Magazine cover.

I’m too busy because I write obituaries now.  Did you know that?

After a long fight, the news industry lost a valued member today. Time magazine lost to it’s battle with declining readership & subscriptions.  Some say the ‘reality showing of America’ & make-you-look circus tent-esque tv programming were the final blow to make Time run a cry-for-help shock jock cover of a 3 year old boy nursing his mother’s exposed breast.  There will be a tribute to the dear, departed publication on this week’s Meet The Press, which is guest hosted by Kim Kardashian. Rest in Peace, Journalism.

Jill

Our network is so glad to have Melissa Gorga, star of the Real Housewives of New Jersey on air Friday 4/27/12.

Kim Pirrella, host of The Ordinary & The Extraordinary, hosts her sister Melissa and their other sister Lysa.

You’ve seen the 3 of them interact on Bravo’s hit show & heard them on my shows before. Now, Kim hosts her own show and her sisters!

Tune in at 1pmEST to NotSoSoccerMomRadio.com .

The show will run all day untill 10EST so everyone can hear.

Click HERE to go to the station site!

I love Bethenny & her Cadbury Egg success story.  Hard on outside, soft on inside, selling product hand-over-fist.

Bethenny this week with Daughter Bryn

Bethenny Ever After is in Dreaded Season Three.   Season One= Fun and new.  Season Two= next layer unfolds. Season Three= stunt-casting, staged interactions & fancy (er) trips.  (I wrote the same 3 years ago about Jon &Kate)  http://notsosoccermom.com/blog/2009/03/24/grump-snore-more-my-take-on-jon-kate/

What I liked—no, loved— about Bethenny when she came on our screens was the package of funny, hot, smart & a touch manic.   Now that she’s gotten all the things we famously heard Ramona prophecy in a reunion show  (baby, fella and success ), she has become less fun to watch.

Particularly annoying were two facets of the show:   Bethenney’s sex talk/ potty mouth schtick.  Where these comments used to be real, funny & appropriately placed, they now seem too eager to make conversation, shock others and glib.  It’s like a caricature of herself from Season One. Secondly, her wayward Old- Married -Woman -With-Kid- I’m -So -Tired -Routine.  We get it.  You’re settled in.  But you’re a Settled In Millionaire who gets to do & have things only 1/100,000 of us do.   Your fan base ARE the moms out here who have been through year two of marriage and having a toddler and being sex and/or sleep deprived already — without assistants, nurses, ‘events’ to attend & famous Besties.  We want to live through you. So don’t make it look like it sucks or you’re too busy to enjoy it.

Reality TV is hard. We all know what happened before it’s edited to look like it happened.  Bethenny is one of the first to monetize Reality into GIGANTIC bucks & HouseHold Name status. My hope is that she can be a first to take reality back to more real.

Jill

Jerry McGuire- style, I’ve had a few ‘a-ha’ moments today.

The first was a phone call with a friend telling me all about this hilarious blog she follows of a mom who tells stories about her crazy life and how she’s gotten so big lately and expanding to support and show others it’s OKAY to be an imperfect mom. I KNOW— it sounded familiar to me too!?!

The second was Susan Powter’s —- YES~ that one—- interview on NotSoSoccerMomRadio today on Kim’s “Ordinary & Extraordinary” show.   Susan is still speaking her message to Stop The Insanity.  Meaning wellness, feeling comfortable in your own skin and how being the best mom means celebrating yourself. A true NotSoSoccerMom, huh?

Later in the interview, she spoke about reality shows…. how she feels there will soon be a subtle backlash against fakey reality and shows will become even more real—-warts and all.

These three things all swirl together in my head to make a motivation parfait.  As I’ve been working on re-launching the site, moving & working on two internet radio shows, my writing and self-published book have taken back-burner.   Finding time to edit the book & write In My Own Voice blogs becomes a challenge— as my ‘brand’ has come to represent others.

WHO CARES!?   It’s time to hit ‘publish’ on this self-published book and do more ‘warts and all’ writing.  It’s who I am. And I would not be being the original NotSoSoccerMom if I became perfect now, would I?

Jill

Are you ready for the first REAL REALITY BOOK?  Typos, long-winded stories, no names changed to protect the innocent, warts & all?

Susan Powter's interview airs Friday 2/10 at 3,6,9EST on NotSoSoccerMomRadio and all day Saturday 2/11

It’s better to give than to receive.   ( at least this is what i’ve heard… i’ve never really put the theory to practice)

This year, I am teaming with MYSELF to bring to you the perfect holiday gift for the Bravo lover in your home.

—–cue the festive music , here comes the announcer—-

“Hey, housewives across America! Nothing says Christmas like the NotSoSoccerMom commemorative Real Housewives Holiday Basket! For only $1049.99, you and your loved ones will enjoy this beautiful collection of the following gorgeous Housewive related gifts:  

 (((music builds)))

Electronic cigarettes for your Dinner Parties from hell, furry vests for trips across the Tappan Zee Bridge, ‘Close Your Legs to Married Men’ and ‘Thug In a Cocktail Dress’ fitted tees, special dance remix of On Display for your next Goddess Party, a live white dove from the Fantastic Funerals by Phaedra celebrity bereavement line,  autographed copy of Teresa Guidice’s latest cookbook “Momma’s Bringing Home the Bacon & Ingredientses”, a platinum AimEx card  and a whole collection of one-shouldered solid color short cocktail dresses!  

 (((announcer drops tone to hit the disclaimer))) 

 Void where prohibited. Some assembly required. Batteries not included. Tshirts may be too intense for some viewers. Please remain seated until the ride has come to a complete stop. One size fits all. Colors may, in time, fade.

 BUT THAT”S NOT ALL!  If you ACT NOW, we’ll send you this darling Giggy the Pom plush toy in a pink button down satin shirt! BUT WAIT—-   THERE”S MORE!!!   Call NOW  to receive shot glasses from Tamra Barney’s new tequila line “Naked Wasted”.     Operators are standing by!  Make it a lashes poppin, lips bustin’ Christmas and outfit YOUR housewife in everything Housewives!

 (((one more disclaimer)))  NotSoSoccerMom Industries nor any of it’s affiliates take responsibility for damage to or loss  of live white doves during shipping and handling.”

Jill

Call me, girls. We’ll talk further tie-ins. I see a Kim Zolciak guacamole packet on an endcap on my grocery store soon…..