My 3 year old son sleeps in my bed.  In between my husband and me.   I dream about passing out in a Mexican border town & having a kidney cut out of me because he kicks me in the back all night.  He still sleeps with us because we are too lazy to get him in his own room.   Fits + sleepless nights= path of least resistance.

Obviously, the lady who got her nipple pierced with a 3 year old is suffering from the same ailments.

I’m too busy to care about the whole breastfeeding debate that will arise, just as it does every 2-3 years,  out of this Time Magazine cover.

I’m too busy because I write obituaries now.  Did you know that?

After a long fight, the news industry lost a valued member today. Time magazine lost to it’s battle with declining readership & subscriptions.  Some say the ‘reality showing of America’ & make-you-look circus tent-esque tv programming were the final blow to make Time run a cry-for-help shock jock cover of a 3 year old boy nursing his mother’s exposed breast.  There will be a tribute to the dear, departed publication on this week’s Meet The Press, which is guest hosted by Kim Kardashian. Rest in Peace, Journalism.

Jill

Here’s today’s Beaut Camp show preview!!! I’m announcing the winners of our give-away with Bloom.com–the social beauty store and have two FABULOUS Guests—Beauty Industry Guru Susie Galvez & mom blogger/ author Rebekah Hunter Scott !

I spent $206 at the grocery store this morning.  Yet, I was just told ‘we have no food’.

Thought now would be as good a time as any to recap  the What They Say to What They MEAN translation.

They SAY:

(They MEAN:)

“We have NO food!”

(“We are out of Cosmic Brownies.”)

“Mom, EVERYone is going!”

(“I know one person going so far and you will have to take and pick up.”)

“I did clean my room.”

(“Dear Sweet Baby Jesus, please don’t look under my bed.”)

“Whatever, Allie!”

(“I have no intelligible response.”)

“There’s nothing to do.”

( “We are out of Cosmic Brownies AND the internet is down.”)

“Can I make cookies if I clean up the kitchen?”

( “I will be eating dough in the kitchen if you need me.”)

“Yes…. uh huh…. in a minute… coming… what did you say?”

(“I’m on Pinterest & won’t hear a thing till you pry the phone out of my hands.”)

Jill

Was asked today to write about how NotSoSoccerMomRadio got started.     Thanks, Janet Hinz, my former fellow host on Toginet.com  radio for asking.

Short version:  (Sorry, I have to listen to Sammy tell about how she did on her Westward Expansion test. Turns out this is not Sak’s idea of adding stores in Utah.)

I’m back.

Now, Jerry wants me to go sit on the deck. Now, Sammy’s screaming about having to do the dishes.  

Where was I?    Ummmm,   this thing that I do…. in front of the computer.

OH!    YOU KNOW I started writing things in 2005. Much like THIS piece, but MUCH more organized.  ahem….  Then, we named it. Jerry came up with them name.   Then, the site rolled on & I  was offered my own one hour radio show weekly.

Now Jerry is walking through here like Jimmy Fallon on SNL playing some homemade song about growing up on Highgate Lane. Look it up. He grew up on Highgate Lane. 

Then, one day, a lightning bolt of genius strikes me.  Or maybe I’d had too many Coronas.

Sammy —STILL trying to do the seven dishes—just launched a large sauce pot into the sink and is covered in soapy water. 

Where was I? OH, NotSoSoccerMoms aren’t just ME. My plight, stories, expertise, voice and gig are everyone’s.  I call some of my closest Twitter friends, bloggers, bright mommas who GET IT.    They say YES.   We each take a weekday & name our own show. We each take a lead focus. We teach ourselves how to  use editing tools, run a radio station, get guests, promote and create our own site.  Together with our Assistant Billy, Anne, Alissa, Jill, Kim and I start a flipping radio station.

We just finished Week 10.   Five shows a week. Guest have included 90′s icons, authors, reality stars, Broadway stars, entrepreneurs, our kids, sisters, friends and dads. ( BIG NAMES, too. And more to come.  I don’t wanna be a name-dropper, but surely you’ve heard of Papa Wayne..>?)

Jill

All of it so we can hope to entertain, inspire, encourage, laugh, support and highlight other NotSoSoccerMoms, Dads and people.

**** And if I had video of Sammy getting soaked by the soapy water, I’d be viral on Youtube by now & have major coin to purchase assistants & tech geeks for all us.  Until then, we do it ourselves.  Writing a blog while juggling Sammy, Jerry & hoping no one hid my Nutella jar…again.

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