( the name of this deli shall remain nameless in case I change my mind in 2 minutes… and also because they have the NotSoSoccerMom business card on display…)

The Deli.  You don’t just ‘run through the drive-thru’ to get your afternoon soda out here in the NorthEast. Gas stations barely carry bottles of water. There are no big lovely Quick Trips. So you gotta schlep (fancy northeastern word) into a deli.

The deli in question was already skating on very thin ice last fall over The Amazing Kids’ Grilled Cheese Incident.  It was in the papers and on the news… You didn’t hear of it?  

~~~~Charge me $4.50 for a piece of fried bread with one lousy Kraft Single on it… think I just fell of that turnip tr~~~~

BUT I DIGRESS! ( what’s new? )

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Of course “Gigi” is my mother; the esteemed Grandmother of the NotSoSoccerKids.   Here are some “Gigi-isms”, vintage mother-speak. 

She’s your mom. She’s my mom. She’s every mom… Read the rest of this entry »

—- this just in from the NSSM wire—-

 The latest ‘Cash For Clunkers’ program,  ‘Cash for Kitchens’, intended to encourage Americans to trade in energy-guzzling large household appliances was announced this morning by the Obama Administration.

Shortly thereafter, prominent New Jersey citizen and Famous Internet Author Jill, of NotSoSoccerMom fame, was appointed  ‘Clunker Czar’.   She explains she was chosen as ‘Clunker Czar’ for a myriad of reasons including, but not limited to, ‘the very high-end, I mean chocolate and everything Edible Arrangement’ she sent Rahm Emmanuel. She then went on to introduce a serious piece of legislation called Credibles for Clunkers.

 ”Credibles for Clunkers is the next important wave in Clunker-ism.  In this program I envision CREDIBLE people who have actually paid their taxes and want what is good for this country, to replace the sorry Congress Clunkers. This is a BI-partisan effort to get rid of the cronies who sit up on Capitol Hill all day only to revel in the sound of their own voices, yet have no intention of voting on behalf of their constituents!”, she said.  When asked what she thought about the Universal Healthcare bill that is still being heatedly debated, Jill replied, “I’m still marinating it around in my head. After all, I think that I may support this. Botox will be free for everyone, right? Nancy is gonna hook me up with her guy. She won’t even give Joe that number!”

Jill

‘Czar’: I like it. Someone go get me a knish and some borscht.

When I am not busy eating dust bunnies, I really like to knock over and bang on this red tin floral item in the family room. I believe some might call it ‘tchotchke’.  Then, when I’m done with that, I crawl through a cube-y type thing mommy uses as an end-table. But enough of my mommy and her bizarre home decor.  

Daddy came to the conclusion that I like to crawl through things and urged mommy to get me one of those nylon tunnels for babies, like you see in SkyMall.

Just so you know the age-old   Money Spent on Toys vs. How Much The Child Enjoys Toy ratio is still intact.  Mommy paid $39.99 for this tunnel-y thing and I want nothing to do with it.

Patrick

It’s not even fun to chew on.

I settled in to watch the Emmy’s last night. No easy task either between the 3 blonde magpies swirling about, the 10 month old baby Moose trying to pull down the entertainment center and the Husband following his fantasy team, the (aptly named) Terribles.  As a Observer of All Things Fab and Sparkly, I am sooo here for my people.

“ Oooh, here comes Kyra Sedgwick in all her pinky rose’ glory. Nene Leakes is doing well as red carpet presenter, but I don’t like her too-red lipstick. Wonder when will Padma arrive?”

Then something happened….

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